Struggling in the black community as a black man, how to overcome.
From personal experience & a bit of observing some homies, as black men, it ain't easy for us to persevere. You're trying to live life dealing with the system of white supremacy, & You have black women who treat you like an enemy (including your own mother), which doesn't make getting your shit together or getting back on your feet easy.
In some situations, you're going to have to not be so prideful. First things first is establishing a place to stay & getting a job (if you don't have one). Wherever you can stay temporarily until you can get better options, take it for as long as you can tolerate them as another person you have to live with. You can start with renting a room if you can't live with a relative.
As far as a job, I recommend a Field that pays enough to pay your rent & bills, and that you can tolerate to work at. If you can tolerate working at McDonald's, standing up on your feet for 8 hours & dealing with belligerent customers, go for it.
I'd prefer jobs that have a lot of downtime, like the UPS (which has benefits after you've been there after probation period) or direct care work (home Healthcare). If you find the right clients in direct care work & you build enough rapport with them, you can create temporary stability because they'll always want to work with you, so you'll always have hours. If they have other aids & they like you more than them, there's a chance you'll get the opportunity to get more hours and tons of overtime. If you have a lot of downtime in your shifts, you'll time to think & write out goals. The ultimate goal is stability. Use the down time to find out what you want to do with your life, and while you're not working, you can investigate how to get into that field. You can also research investments opportunities as well. If the worst case scenario is you getting fired, bam! Backup plans. If you have to, get a 2nd job, make both of them part time. You'll probably be getting 20 hours from both. You don't have any kids so you'll have the time to work them & rest & think. The ups is like that. You can pick the shift you want to work. Same with direct care work.
Fuck the weekends. For a while, until you're resources are straight, fuck the weekends. Them bitches are meaningless anyway. Your weekends are your days off. If your days off are Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, Monday is now your Friday.
Keep your bills to a minimum.
Rent, phone & food bill until you can afford otherwise.
If you have to have internet, get that shit in a phone plan. Until you make enough to afford the internet or cable, do without them. Right now in Philly, the cheapest internet bill for Comcast is about $40 for 100mbps, that's not including equipment rental. If you can afford that, then go for it. But you also want to be saving towards a goal, like a new car, getting your own place, because you're going to want the space & peace of mind. You want to get away from the noisy, negative, unproductive bulshit.
You want the next video game console & them expensive as shit video games. You want to afford Netflix, Hulu and whatever other streaming service. You want to afford better food & the option to build better credit & a gym membership. Whatever is your thing, you want to get it.
Food wise, buy what you can afford. Get food stamps if you qualify. Don't be prideful about that. You paid taxes all them years, now that you need to get on your feet, it's your turn to benefit from the snap program until you get on your feet. Also you can probably stop by your local church and get free food from them. You might need to show ID & sign some paper work, but carrying a bag (box) of food home is the goal.
Stick to stable food. A cartoon of eggs will last you 5 days. Boil them bitches. Boil water, add eggs, let cook for 12-15 minutes & then let them sit in an ice bath. Easy to peel. 2 eggs a day will last you till Sunday. Ground beef or a pack of burger patties, cheese (slices), bread, pasta sauce, pasta, bacon, canned veggies, you can do a million different recipes with ground beef & pasta. Make spaghetti, learn to cook. With YouTube, there's no excuses. Wherever you work has WiFi, get the password & create playlist of recipes. I know a guy who ate hamburger helper for years because he didn't learn. It you know how to read you know how to cook. Don't be cheap on the butter though. Get real butter, not that margarine shit or I can't believe it's not butter, or that vegetable spread crap. If it don't say milk or cream & salt, it's fake, bugs won't eat that shit. Get seasonings. Stable seasons are, garlic powder, salt, pepper, & onion powder. Get a bag of onions, green peppers. If you have a supermarket that sells cooked chicken, grab that shit. You paying $5-7 bucks for a whole chicken, it cost way more at fast food joints & it last longer. 1 bird with last a week. Coffee (if you drink it), a case of water. But as soon as you can afford it, go for the water purifier container. Get 2. This probably a $50 a week grocery bill. What you save from not having to but weekly, buy better quality food.
Best places to shop for food Aldi or save a lot. Aldi is upgrading, so save a lot is the cheaper option. If you have a car, Walmart is good too. $70 a week goes a long way. You want to be spending $100 as a single man with no kids. The best cereals, the best quality meats, cheese, fish, you're going to be spending somewhere around $100 or more. You're going to want to afford almond milk.
When you find out what you want to do, or the goal you're after, grind. When opportunities come up, take them shits. As long as you don't have to sell your soul, take them. When I was walking because my car died, every car that drove by me all those months I had to walk, I keep saying to myself; one day, I'm going to be driving again. One day it's going to be one of those cars. When I wasn't sure how I was going to pay rent, I kept telling myself I would be living better. Not just surviving. I'm in survival mode, but I won't be forever. It's a cliche, I know, but it was all I had. You grind and keep grinding. You eat in, you cook your own meals, you go without things you don't need until you can afford them, it's not going to kill you. You'll be filling up a tank of gas, while everyone else is complaining about gas prices.
If I got the car I had better options to earn paper. If I built my credit up, I'd have better options for a home. You set goals & when you complete them you set other goals. I didn't care if I was working a job that paid $10, because it paid bills. It would allow me to stack. And when the overtime came, it was a bonus. That's all I have for now. If you got questions, shoot them below or hit my inbox. -SSM
